Okay, people of earth — put down your chainsaws and listen up. It’s time to announce the results of the #OF20 competition. 

*There's no such thing as a free beer. You should know that by now. I could maybe do you a breakfast burrito. 

Firstly, thank you all for entering. It was outlandishly hard to choose a winner, and so far as I’m concerned you’re all winners. Apart from Russell Brand, who’s a tosser. As he didn’t actually enter I suppose that’s just gratuitous abuse. So be it. 

The “Picture with a copy of the new edition in it” competition had many fine entries, but in the end Liam Jax (@jaxAttack3B) pulled into the lead with his awesome illustration...  

Competition was also fierce for the “Picture with any previous edition in it" award, many of which — I'm happy to say — featured cats, but I’m afraid that once seen, Bob Lock (@Bob_Lock)’s tortoise-based creation proved impossible to unsee. In fact, I understand that many historians now divide the evolution of human culture into two epochs — that preceeding the existence of this picture, and everything that happens afterward. Time will tell whether that’s a good thing. Time is supposed to be telling a lot of things, and I’m getting bored of waiting. There should be an upgrade tier called “TimePro™” or “Time Enterprise Edition" where you could pay a low monthly fee and be able to interrogate Time right away, without having to wait for it to pass. Plus an app, obviously. With iCloud sync. And Slack integration. 

But, because it’s the kind of guy I am (an idiot), I’m boldly going to also present three runners’ up copies of the new edition, to @eyglo, @motleyhippie and @rossjparsons...




If you could all either DM or IM me your addresses, along with any inscription you might like in the books, I shall get them to you as quickly as my notorious level of inefficiency allows. Worst case, and if you’re still waiting at that point, I’ll bundle in a copy of the 50th Anniversary Edition too. 

Okay — as you were. You must have something else you should be doing. Seriously.